Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Ottawa Writer = Lowlife

I want to share this with you first before I get you upset...

I can't even begin to express how excited I am right now about tomorrow (haha, technically, it's later today). I just got these in my inbox courtesy of my new hero Johnny B. Check these out and tell me this doesn't make you want to jump out of your seat and scream:

And now I've got two articles from the Ottawa Sun to get your blood boiling just in time for tomorrow's game. A bunch of our Friends sent these links in to me because they were OUTRAGED.

The first article, which is merely a bit annoying and is definitely not so bad by comparison to the second article, claims that the High Ankle Sprain (H.A.S. as the author, James Duthie, abbreviates it below) is the MVP of the Penguins. What irritated me about this particular journalistic gem is the following analogy:
H.A.S. No. 2 happened Jan. 18th when Crosby crashed into the boards in a game against Tampa. As he was being carried off the ice, I turned to the boys in our studio and said something to the effect of "Hasta la vista, Penguinos" (which was dated and rather lame, but it was all I had).

Oh, and it was also dead wrong.

Evgeni Malkin reacted to Crosby's absence the way placekick holder Andy Petrovic did when Gus, the field-goal kicking mule, was kidnapped in the 1976 Disney classic, aptly named Gus: The Field-Goal Kicking Mule. Andy took matters into his own hands and ran for the winning touchdown to give the California Atoms the championship.
By equating Geno's awesome accomplishments to a subpar (at best) Disney movie about a football playing ass is about as insulting as calling the Queen "Yo, Baby!" Ah, but this is just the tip of the iceberg...

The Ottawa Sun editors actually allowed this next asshat (otherwise known as Don Brennan) to publicly encourage the Senators players to injure our superstar Penguins players - Sidney, particular - in order to pull the upset. Oh no, I'm not kidding. Read on (I've included the most incriminating section of the article on the off chance that the editors come to their senses and force Brennan to remove it):
With Daniel Alfredsson and Mike Fisher out, Schubert and Antoine Vermette are the only two Ottawa players still skating that are on the first two power-play and penalty-killing units, along with taking a regular shift. In Schubert's case, his even-strength turn is as a crashing and bashing, fourth-line left winger.

In that role, he left a mark on last spring's Senators-Penguins playoff meeting.

With the series tied 1-1 and the site switched to Pittsburgh, Schubert crushed and injured defenceman Robert Scuderi with an illegal, hit-from-behind into the end boards. The Penguins were incensed and went after Schubert. They also went on to lose that game as well as the only other two in the series.

"That one hit, it was like (they were saying) 'I want to go in and hurt somebody,' " Schubert recalled. "We were there at the same time, he kind of turned away and it ended up a bad hit from behind, but I don't think I went out there to be under their skin. I just wanted to play my game. The physical part is part of it. The more physical you are against other players, everybody knows they get a little frustrated ... they can't do their perfect game. It's just part of my job."

The very banging and battering the Penguins wanted to avoid from the Flyers can serve as an equalizer in this series for the undermanned Senators. They just need to bring it. Schubert, Chris Neil, Martin Lapointe, Cody Bass, Shean Donovan, Mike Commodore and Anton Volchenkov will be key players for Ottawa.

They have to frustrate the skilled Penguins. They have to throw them off their game. Sidney Crosby, Evgeni Malkin, Marian Hossa, Petr Sykora and Sergei Gonchar have to be targeted. They cannot be allowed to free-wheel without concern or they will roll right over the Senators.

Crosby's got a bad RIGHT ankle? How will it stand up to a two-hander? The Senators have to find out.

The Penguins obviously wanted Ottawa over the Broadstreet Bullies. The defending Eastern Conference champs should feel a great sense of disrespect. They should be insulted -- even more so than in being referred to as purse swingers -- and they should respond in kind.

As much as they will be looking for timely goaltending and scoring, the Senators need somebody to emerge as a modern-day Bobby Clarke. Maybe hockey historian Jason Spezza can explain to his teammates what the former Flyers captain did to Russian star Valeri Kharlamov when the latter had a bad ankle in the 1972 Summit Series.

It's playoff time. Anything goes.
There is ABSOLUTELY NO EXCUSE FOR THIS. In no way is this journalism; this is sensationalism. It is reprehensible, irresponsible, and should have been nixed by the editors before it ever went to print. Not only does it display a lack of decency, compassion, and morality for wishing injury to another human being, but it also reeks of desperation for attention. Senators fans should be outraged, too. This article shows Brennan's complete lack of faith in the Senators' talent alone being enough to win.

Ever the level-headed leader, our title man and his large framed teammate, BIG GEORGES LARAQUE had this to say in response to Brennan's jackassery™ (from The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette):
"They can write whatever they want, but, if somebody was to do that to the best player in the world, they'll be suspended the rest of the playoffs," Penguins winger and enforcer Georges Laraque said. "That writer is just stupid. I've never heard anything so stupid."

Crosby, asked about the article, said without missing a beat, "It's my left."

He didn't seem worried.

"It wouldn't be the first time something like that happened," Crosby said. "Teams obviously read injury reports. If a guy's got a bad shoulder, I'm sure you're not going to ease up and not hit him. That's typical. Whether or not they deliberately do it, who knows? But that's why refs are out there, to police the game and make sure that stuff doesn't happen."
And if the refs won't protect Sid, we always have BGL, Hal Gill, and don't forget Scary Gary Roberts!!! He is back and ready to send the Senators to the golf course in 5 games (or less!).

[*Takes deep breath*] You better buckle your seatbelts... this series might literally be a very bumpy ride.

Big thanks go out to Johnny B. for the sweet shots of the Mellon Arena marquee, and to Ashley, Greg C., Susan W., and Michelle B. for the links to the Ottawa Sun articles.

GO PENS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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