Sidney's Future Mother-In-Law

There are WAAAAY too many jokes that could be made about mothers-in-law here, so I'll just skip it and let you make your own. And don't get any ideas - I'm definitely not referring to my own mother, as she is already mother-in-law to my wonderful husband. No, this story is, well, weird, to say the least. Columnist Cathy McDonald writes in The Halifax Daily News online ten reasons why Sidney Crosby should marry her daughter. I'm not kidding. This article actually got published. To save you some time, here are the reasons she gives:

Why Sidney? The rich and famous stuff is nice, but unimportant. What I like is that people who have actually met him say he's the real thing: a nice, articulate, hard working, polite, down-to-earth guy. Who doesn't want that guy for their daughter?

While my matchmaking hasn't gotten too far, I have compiled the Top 10 Reasons Why Sidney Crosby Should Marry My Daughter:

1. So I can stop answering the phone with "you're not good enough" when boys call.

2. Because she is smart and pretty.

3. Because she is from Nova Scotia. Pittsburgh girls are lovely, but they can't beat a girl from Nova Scotia.

4. She can skate hard, yet emerge from the dressing room with perfect hair.

5. She's spent years having her life exposed in the newspaper. Not as much ink as Sid gets, I know, but she can handle media attention.

Marriage material, evidently
6. She's funny. Really funny.

7. She speaks excellent French. BBQ at Mario Lemieux's? No problem!

8. She once said she'd like to marry a European soccer player. This is close.

9. Her dad's beer league team could use the talent. And finally:

10. Sid would obviously have the best mother-in-law in the world.

Okay. Let me just say this: Honestly, how PISSED OFF do you think this woman's daughter is right now? WOW. This is a bit much. There's nothing like desperately trying to sell your daughter's best qualities to a celebrity whom she'll most likely never meet in a very public forum so all of her friends, classmates, neighbors, and complete strangers can see and think to themselves, "WTF?!?!" Thanks a lot, Mom!

While this article was no doubt meant to be a tongue in cheek statement about how nice Sid is, it comes off distastefully as a mother trying desperately to sell ("pimp" might even be an appropriate word here) her daughter to a famous person. The point of Sid being a good guy gets lost in the ridiculousness of the story, coupled with the questionable credibility of the author - considering she didn't even know who Sidney was until her husband told her.

It sort of makes you wonder why she'd want her daughter to marry him then, eh? Sounds like Mama liked what she saw (YIKES!) and only then was interested in finding out who he was. And of course, you can bet she was probably quite pleasantly surprised to find out he is a nice, rich, famous, talented young man. Why not humiliate your kid and write an article to try to call Sid out in hopes of meeting him yourself, right? Unbelievable.

*[Sigh]* Sid should probably look into getting a pre-emptive restraining order against this mother-of-the-year.

(Big thanks to Friend of The Show Eric B. from The Sidney Crosby Spotlight for pointing this one out to me.)